A year to the day...
It's been a year. Exactly a year. I'm still here, and still frustrated.
I don't know what to do with myself these days. I want to do something productive, but I'm not really sure what. I can please myself for the most part, but there are days where I would like someone telling me to do things, and I'm not just talking housework or garden things.
I don't know what I will be like if I become my own boss running my own small business, but I'm prepared to give it a go. I am probably procrastinating, but I have decided that I am doing nothing about advertising or things till I am back from my two weeks away at the military vehicle show next month. There's no point really, since I'll be away for a fortnight, and it would be silly to start something, set it all up, get the advertising sorted and then not being able to respond to any queries because I'm not here.
All that is all well and good, but we don't go till the 8th or 9th of July and I'm feeling at a bit of a loose end. I could do all the packing for going away, but then we would have bags of stuff kicking about and getting in the way. I could get on with another christening gown, but I've not finalised the skirt pattern in my head yet and I need to know how it all works before I do that bit too... The one I'm working on/designing at the moment is a little more complicated than my usual.
I'm mostly wanting to look forward to something, and I don't know what. I'm looking forward to two weeks away, but I know there will be frustrations and annoyances with himself as he disappears for hours on end. I'm looking forward to doing the Christening Gown business, but I'm very wary of biting off more than I can chew. I would like to be looking forward to something that's consequence-free, something good, something nice, something that I can really pour my energy into, but I don't know what it is yet.
Perhaps it's the very factt hat I have to do most things with only half the energy I used to that makes me feel like this, but I feel like I've been waiting for something... I don't know what... for a year now.
I will wait, and I will be as patient as possible, but the patience is wearing a little thin. It was a year ago to the day that I first had the problems I'm facing now, and I'm still no nearer a conclusion. Only another couple of weeks and I'll know for certain whether I will be stuck like this or not.... Now that's something I'm not looking forward to...
I don't know what to do with myself these days. I want to do something productive, but I'm not really sure what. I can please myself for the most part, but there are days where I would like someone telling me to do things, and I'm not just talking housework or garden things.
I don't know what I will be like if I become my own boss running my own small business, but I'm prepared to give it a go. I am probably procrastinating, but I have decided that I am doing nothing about advertising or things till I am back from my two weeks away at the military vehicle show next month. There's no point really, since I'll be away for a fortnight, and it would be silly to start something, set it all up, get the advertising sorted and then not being able to respond to any queries because I'm not here.
All that is all well and good, but we don't go till the 8th or 9th of July and I'm feeling at a bit of a loose end. I could do all the packing for going away, but then we would have bags of stuff kicking about and getting in the way. I could get on with another christening gown, but I've not finalised the skirt pattern in my head yet and I need to know how it all works before I do that bit too... The one I'm working on/designing at the moment is a little more complicated than my usual.
I'm mostly wanting to look forward to something, and I don't know what. I'm looking forward to two weeks away, but I know there will be frustrations and annoyances with himself as he disappears for hours on end. I'm looking forward to doing the Christening Gown business, but I'm very wary of biting off more than I can chew. I would like to be looking forward to something that's consequence-free, something good, something nice, something that I can really pour my energy into, but I don't know what it is yet.
Perhaps it's the very factt hat I have to do most things with only half the energy I used to that makes me feel like this, but I feel like I've been waiting for something... I don't know what... for a year now.
I will wait, and I will be as patient as possible, but the patience is wearing a little thin. It was a year ago to the day that I first had the problems I'm facing now, and I'm still no nearer a conclusion. Only another couple of weeks and I'll know for certain whether I will be stuck like this or not.... Now that's something I'm not looking forward to...
posted by Me at 12:59 am
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